On Croissants and the Internet's Love for Anything That Oozes

I review TikTok's favorite croissant from Lafayette Grand Cafe and Bakery.

I woke up at 7am Friday morning with one specific goal in mind: to consume a croissant. Simple, in theory, but far more challenging than I presupposed.

The reason for that challenge is specific to the pastry I was pursuing. It wasn’t some Panera bread croissant I was after, oh no. This croissant, from Lafayette Grand Cafe and Bakery in NoHo, was—dare I say—TikTok famous. *Hold for gasps*

Yeah, so, I succumbed to TikTok food porn. Sue me! You would too if you saw a croissant the size of a baby’s head oozing with chocolate ganache on your For You page. And so, too, did the 40-minute-long line of patrons who waited with me to buy that oozy croissant this Friday morning. I joined the line somewhere around 8:20 a.m., thinking I’d have just enough time to snag a pastry and zip to the office. I was gravely incorrect.

The members of this embarrassingly long line I joined were mostly young adults like myself. One girl ahead of me donned a beige matching workout set, an ensemble quite popular among the That Girl TikToker regime.

As the minutes passed, a sense of shame crept up over me. I am waiting far too long, like a fool, for this internet-famous croissant when hundreds of patisseries exist in this city with shorter lines and flakier pastries, I thought to myself. And I am among people who are witlessly waiting with me. Do they not feel dreadful, too?

One passerby asked the manager delegating the line what everyone was waiting for. “Our croissant went viral on TikTok,” he answered jadedly. He continued ushering in customers one by one to the bakery section of the cafe where one person behind the counter accepted payments while another person packaged the croissants into dainty boxes.

Some random day in mid-May these croissants became food TikTok’s favorite new thing. I’d see day in my life TikToks where girls would make a stop at Lafayette to order one or a TikTok of someone tearing the laminated circle open to reveal a bleeding center of chocolate would grace my For You Page. Even before my plane landed in New York for the summer, these croissants were on my radar.

Oozy foods have always been fodder for internet virality—remember when everybody wanted a runny egg yolk on everything? Food ooze photographs beautifully and offers up an exhibitionist quality to the eating experience. If I felt more up for a detailed analysis, perhaps I’d go into how the porn industry and the internet food industry both gamify beautiful ejaculations of sorts—but I won’t. I’ll just leave this here.

Unfortunately, however, as soon as the food ooze hits the internet and swathes of people show interest, the price of the food soars with or without a warrant.

That brings us to this $9 Strawberry Supreme croissant Lafayette sells.

Some notes on the croissant: it is incredibly massive; a pool of strawberry cream/curd resides within its laminated walls; rose petals and dried strawberries are sprinkled upon careful drizzles of ruby red icing. It’s got some weight to it and could easily sustain your hunger well past lunch. Upon a first bite into the flaky and delicately laminated dough, spurts (Is that a word? It feels like the right one.) of the cream/curd drip out. The croissant is a messy one. It desires attention even before the theatric reveal of curd and equally afterwards as well.

But is it worth a 40-minute wait in the summer sun on a Friday morning? I think this question is partially irrelevant, because it assumes that everyone purchases a $10 (with tip) TikTok croissant for the same reasons. Some would revel in the croissant’s looks and the ooze of the curd and the ensuing TikTok clout from capturing this beauty on camera; others could appreciate the intentional care in culinary creation that something that massive and gorgeous requires. Some think $10 is too pretty to spend on one single item in a pastry case. And some simply love joining long lines in New York.

All justifications are fine, as long as you aren’t an asshole about your own.

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Thanks for reading! This was fun.

Things I’m loving:

• The song of the summer? Perhaps it’s Can’t Nobody Love Me Like You Do by General Johnson. Though three weeks ago it was We Not Humpin Remix by Flo Milli and Monaleo, so expect that it’ll be something completely different three weeks from now.

• I had a Sherry Cherry Coke from Yellow Rose in Manhattan, and I’m still thinking about it.

• New York City, baby! For those unaware, I’m here for the summer, or perhaps forever if some lovely media publication wants to give me enough money to stay here.